Window to Baikal
Things move so slowly. So I have to be patient, and keeping trying. I am telling myself this, as I get increasingly frustrated.

No one in the Far East has emailed me back. It’s only been a week for TTT, the tiger people, but for the summer camp it’s more like two. And if I email them again, will I be annoying? In the case of the summer camp, probably not. But I, of course, am not so excited about the summer camp and may leave it to slide away. But if I am serious about any of this I shouldn’t. The tiger people I suppose I should give a couple more days to answer, I feel like they are probably fairly busy.

As for my petition for the independent study thing… I failed to meet with my advisor and discuss it with her again, and instead wrote a proposal (again, the night before, but at least with a lot more thought put into it beforehand) entirely on my own.

Here’s my proposal, take two.

I would like to explore how the native peoples of the Lake Baikal region percieve nature. As the highly technologized Western culture continues to spread across the world I feel it is important to consider traditional ideas of how to live in balance with nature, before they are altogether lost, along with the nature itself. Siberia, like my home in Alaska, offers an opportunity to explore a way of living which is not yet overwhelmed by cities. Because I already have a relatively good command of the Russian language, I think I will be able to talk directly with the native people. Throughout grade school, I spent a lot of time reading collections of folklore from around the world, and I know that natural phenomena are often anthropomorphized, as the Sun, the Moon, and various animals become actors in the stories. Taking into account the personalities which are attributed to natural forces in the folk tradition, I would like to see if the modern perception of nature is substantially different. Through interviews I hope to learn how the modern attitudes of the native peoples may have changed under the influence of Westernization.
Essentially, this is a project in cultural anthropology. I know I have not taken any classes on anthropology, but the course work included in the SIT program preceding the actual individual study is designed to give me the background I will need to explore a topic of ethnic and/or cultural focus. And I have been studying culture, I merely have not been studying the study of culture.

I mean, that’s definitely more comprehensive than my first proposal, which was “I’d like to study the folklore and shamanistic tradition of the native peoples of the Lake Baikal region,” in not too many more words. And maybe they won’t like that either, even if it is better written, and more detailed. When I did see my advisor, just before handing in the new proposal, she looked at it and said she thought I should probably be proposing to do something literary, since that’s what academic background is in, so far. But if I do something literary, then I might as well stick with an approved program that stays in St. Petersburg the whole time. She did, however, look at the other papers I was attaching this time and say it was good that I was including part of a paper I wrote for Popular Russian Culture, because the committee had asked about that course. The bad thing there is that I accidentally took that class pass-fail, and didn’t realize it until it was too late to change it.

It would be nice if I could personally appear before this committee, and address their questions personally, rather than blindly submitting things to them based on what the original form said, and the second hand information I received from the less-than-nice lady in the Office of International Studies.

When I went to hand in my independent study proposal and my general internal application (yes, I have to apply to Wesleyan to go abroad, apply to go on this specific program, and apply to the program itself. red tape. huge fucking gobs of it, all over.) the nicer OIS lady was there. “I’m here to turn in my application,” I said.

“Oh, what’s your last name?” she asked. “I’ll pull your file.”

I tell her my last name. “I’m the one whose petition was tabled, and I’m resubmitting my independent study proposal.”

“Ah, yes,” she says brightly. “Your file is still in Jane’s office.”

But I got my official transcript today, and gave the academic reference forms to my advisor and my current language professor, and should have those back by Monday. By Thursday I should know if my petition went through this time. This weekend Emily and I will have a SIT application party and discuss significant intercultural experiences and their effects on ourselves, and maybe, just maybe, I can send off the application before spring break. Then I will go and row and not think for 10 days, sleep for a couple, and maybe then when I reemerge to a state wherein I can think clearly without being oriented towards food, sleep, or keeping the boat set, I will find that everything has worked out perfectly and I will definitely be spending my fall semester studying ethnic and cultural things in Russia.

Alternatively, if they reject my petitition, I have a few options. 1) Take the semester off and go anyway, because I think I have enough credits to do so. 2) Resubmit the damn petition again, this time claiming I wish to study the life, prose and poetic works of Siberian literary figure Yevgeny Yevtishenko. 3) Get my shit together real quick and apply to go on one of the approved programs (the one with the orientation in Helsinki). 4) Go have a temper tantrum either in the Office of International Studies or before the faceless committee responsible for my displeasure. 5) Bitch and moan about how I should have gone to school on the West Coast.

Option 4, I think, is least likely to get me anywhere.